Tag: run

Feeling Good.

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The bed was warm and cosy this morning. I wasn’t really quite ready to wake up fully and start the day and taking coffee back to bed and curling up with my book was very tempting. But I can curl up and read at any time, the chances of me getting out and running diminish with every extra minute spent in bed. And I did sort of want to run. I wanted to finish the week on a high and have done my three runs this week. I am also not at all sure about what the weather is going to do over the next week and if it gets snowy/icy, I won’t run. I get too scared. So I wanted to make sure I go out and run while I can.

Kath, I think, felt much the same so we did what we had agreed the night before and set off to Bolton Abbey without allowing ourselves to talk ourselves and each other out of going. It was cold. It was -3 according to the car and with the windchill felt colder than that. I was nicely wrapped up with my long sleeved running top tucked in and my running jacket over the top, ruff around my neck and a hat. That’s quite rare for me. Given that I spent 2025 feeling like I was mostly overheating, it felt glorious to be out in the cold. Kath had suggested she might do our Bolton Abbey aqueduct loop backwards. Doing familiar routes backwards is fun. You see things differently, so I did the same.

This was my ‘long’ run. The aim was really just to get round the loop. I didn’t have that much confidence that it would be pain free but I has hoping that it would be a niggle rather than proper pain. Anyway, once I had made my way tentatively over the bridge at the Cavendish Pavilion (it wasn’t actually that slippery – just looked it in the frost), I set off running 30 seconds and walking a minute. I just wanted to be really gentle with body and mind. I wanted to not get over excited at having had a good week with exercise. I wanted to try and get as far as I could without being in any pain.

It was quiet. I saw one or two people but really not many. I really enjoyed the stillness, the sunshine, the clear air. It took a few minutes to adjust to the cold air hitting my lungs but then everything seemed to come into sharp focus. I was aware of the surface being just a little harder than normal, the grass crunchy. I felt the cold air on my face and really noticed how bits of the route were even colder than others, I felt the effort of the sun to bring some warmth and the air drop a few degrees as I dropped further into the valley out of the sun’s reach. I heard the rustling of little birds and a dog bark in the distance. I heard my own breathing. It was all quite glorious really.

I got to 2.8 miles before I was really aware of any tightness. I had been aware of my body slowly warming up. At some point I had rolled my sleeves up a bit and wondered whether I was exposing enough to skin to get any benefit from the sun. Could my wrists make vitamin D was a question I pondered for a while (you know what I mean). At the aqueduct where I paused to take a picture, I briefly considered taking my hat off but didn’t, same with the ruff around my neck. I was warm but not that warm. So at just before 2 miles I began to be aware that my right ankle was stiff and my hip was getting a bit tight. But that was it. And it didn’t get any worse. I just kept going and managed a decent little run downhill to finish. Kath was waiting for me and there was a heron in the middle of the river looking rather majestic. There was no pain. It was perfect. 3.5 miles. Slow and steady with lots of walking. This feels sustainable. This feels like sensible building blocks. This feels good!

Here we go again – or new year, same me, or something

Jess Guth1 Comment
A photo of compacted gravel path which is a little wet and lined by trees without their leaves. They sky is grey and the scene looks like winter.

Hello 2026. You seem friendly enough so far. And just like that it’s January again. The New Year, New You brigade has stepped up another gear. I saw a post earlier about how to drop 20 pounds in just 2 weeks, then another telling me that ‘A summer body could be yours in just 6 months – however heavy you are now’ (or something like that, it was snappier). I have seen adverts for fitness apps, for upgrades to otherwise free fitness apps, for training programmes, for running plans, for fitness gear, for gym memberships…I have seen an avalanche of nonsense hit my social media feeds. And today I do not care. I don’t care because today I am tapped into the ridiculousness of it all. The fitness influencer posts make me laugh – I see you and your interesting camera angles, pulled in tummy and filters. I see you. You do you. Just don’t expect me to take any of it seriously, or to follow you or take any advice from you.

I think I can see the ridiculousness of it all because I know enough about exercise, have read some of the research, have talked to some people who do actually know what they are doing to understand that what I am being bombarded with is mostly nonsense. Of course I have my own fitness goals. They’re not bounded by the year though and also, I made very little progress (if any) towards them recently. I am a worse runner than I have been for a long time, I am not strong, I’m not flexible, I am not fit. And that’s ok. I am just going to keep doing what I have been doing: what I can, when I can. Without judgment, without pressure, just what I can, when I can. I know that consistency is what will take me to where I want to be. So consistency is the aim – consistently doing something. I have felt pretty good for the last few days. So I have done stuff. I have done some Body Coach workouts, some yoga, some daily stretch routines for runners and some actual running. Sort of. I know I am unlikely to be able to keep all of it up in the same way, but it felt good. So let’s just see where it takes me. See what is possible when we throw work back into the mix.

a photo of the River Wharfe at the Bolton Abbey Estate. The river is quite low flowing of a series of stones

This morning’s run felt like a win. I haven’t really done any run or run/walk beyond a mile recently and certainly not without my right ankle, lower leg, and hip being quite painful. I was going to try and run a loop at Bolton Abbey. But as I was making my way up towards the Strid Wood, the tightness in my right ankle and calf started. I was a bit upset by that because I’d only gone about half a mile and that included my warm up walk. I tried to concentrate on relaxing and good form. I was only running 30 seconds with a 1 minute walk break. I also slowed the walk break and didn’t stride out. The tightness eased. As I approached the Strid I thought that I wouldn’t be able to keep this going with the hilly bits and the full 3.5 mile loop. So instead, I turned round and made my way back along the (relatively) flat path between the Strid and the Cavendish Pavilion. I got back pain free. The tightness came back at the end but no pain. 2.25 miles in the bag and logged on my spreadsheet. I gave up logging my miles in 2025 because it seemed a bit pointless – but this year it feels like I might like to know as I go along. We’ll see.

A selfie of me showing Head and shoulders. I have a slightly flushed face from running, have my hair back using a yellow and black ruff and am wearing a green running jacket under a blue winter jacket

So 2026 starts much like the last few years generally have – with a run of some description, some exercise, some planned ‘races’ in the calendar and some fitness goals that just always exist in the background and have nothing to do with the calendar rolling over. So, here we go again, or still, or whatever. I am still me, not new, not improved, just me. And honestly, I’m pretty happy with that!

I hope 2026 brings us all some calm so we can make our own adventures, create our own chaos and choose to be who and how we want to be.

Waiting…

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It feels a little like we need to collectively get on with it now. This year I am not at all keen on this in between time. I feel like I am waiting. Waiting for what, I don’t know. But waiting can be a full time occupation so it’s annoying. So in an attempt to not wait for whatever it is I am waiting for, I went for a little run. I even warmed up with some stretches first.

I was hoping for maybe a 2 mile run/walk, ideally pain free. But as I set off I realised I hadn’t actually set any run/walk intervals and I also didn’t really want to stop to walk as I was plodding my way down the hill and wondering whether I should have put another layer on. I was cold. So I kept going. I had a route in mind. But as I got further along, I realised I really did not want to go that route. I had a 15 second walk to gather my thoughts, turned right down a road I am not sure I have ever run down before, and headed towards the canal. I wasn’t settled. I threw in another 20 second walk just to see if I could breathe like a normal human and then set off again to at least claim the mile.

So I basically ran a mile and then called it. My right ankle was tightening again – mostly as I settled into walking though and my hip was niggly. The canal was also busy. On a short stretch between the two bridges I used today, I counted 7 dog walkers and at least 10 dogs. I did not want other people. I just need to get into the habit of going earlier again. I like the time when I have the towpath mostly to myself, or only share it with others who also welcome the solitude – passing in a fleeting moment that needs only to be acknowledged with a nod. None of this constant chirpy ‘good morning’ that I had to endure today. I actually quite like greeting strangers, saying hello, maybe even making a remark about the weather. It’s a nice, friendly thing and it makes me smile. But not when I am trying to run. Just leave me be in my misery and effort. I’ll nod, I’ll smile and I might even force out a ‘hi’ but a full ‘Good Morning’. No.

Anyway, I was a bit grumpy with my lack of ability to run more than a mile (or my unwillingness). But as I stopped, a group of ducks and swans came to see me. I know they wanted feeding really but it felt like they were coming to acknowledge my effort and make me smile. So I walked the last stretch of canal happily watching them, crossed the bridge and walked up the hill. I have zero hill fitness so I deliberately walked up the most direct, but also steepest route. There is only one way to get hill fit…

It was nice to be out. It’s always nice to be out.

Still struggling but in a less annoying way

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So yesterday, it turns out, was just a really stupid day. Today is less stupid. I am still struggling a bit. I am at least wearing the right socks (for now anyway, there’s still time to change my mind) and the fact that it is Sunday seems less irritating than yesterday being Saturday. In other words, my brain is less weird. I am back to rolling my eyes at the fitness crap as I scroll passed. I could block some of the content I suppose, but that would require engagement on some level – so nah.

I did my measurements earlier and added them to the Body Coach app – wide load sign required I think. And then I went for a little run. Mainly because I didn’t want to. I thought about how far I wanted to go and had vague ideas about 3 or 4 miles but then I remembered that I can’t actually run at the moment. So I decided to just not worry about it, go by feel and just aim to get out there and move a bit. I mostly ran for a mile. A slow plod on the downhill and flat and then, on the one slightly up hill slope, a lamp post to lamp post run/walk. Then my right ankle started tightening up so I decided to walk back rather than risk actual pain. By the time I had walked up the hill, there was some pain so stopping and walking home was the right thing to do.

I also tried out my birthday trainers – a pair of black wide fitting Brooks Adrenalines. They’re good. Comfy, supportive without being too springy. No squished toes, no foot pain.

Once I got back and sat down with Kath while she finished her workout, the niggle spread into my hip. Nonetheless I did the first workout on the Body Coach App. I’ve done that workout several times over the years and it seems every time I forget just how much completely inane babble there is. Does Joe ever shut up? I know he’s trying to be helpful and motivating and maybe it works because I did finish the workout. Then I remembered that I am too old to not stretch so stretched. I am quite pleased with that sequence. Recently the sequence has been more like: I should run, yeah don’t wanna, I can run later. Later comes and goes. I didn’t run, oh well, I can run tomorrow. I could do a workout instead. Hm, yes but I’m not wearing a bra. I can’t possibly put a sports bra on now. That’s just too much. I should do some stretches. I’ll do those before bed. Then I am in bed, not having stretched. Repeat.

So first, praise for this morning’s me who put a sports bra on. Oh she was a wise woman! Then thanks to my silly brain for recognising that, given I was already wearing a sports bra, already sweaty and already in the exercise-y headspace, not doing the Body Coach workout after my run now would just be ridiculous and such a waster opportunity. And then thanks to hungry me who really wanted lunch but decided that another 10 minutes really didn’t make a difference and anyway, it would take me that long to recover from the workout and I was already sitting on the mat – stretches just made sense.

So there. I wouldn’t say I am having a good day. I still feel a bit flat. But I am having a positive day full of baby steps towards having a better day tomorrow.

Struggling

Jess Guth3 Comments
From our Early Dec trip

It was my birthday yesterday. It was a lovely day, as was Christmas day before that and Christmas Eve. They were all lovely. They were as we planned them, they were calm and quiet, I enjoyed cooking and yesterday I enjoyed Kath taking over and being looked after and spoilt. We had lovely food with our mums, cuddles with cats and not a ‘should’ in sight. It was exactly as I had hoped it would be. And today I feel completely flat. Somehow it feels like the last 2 or 3 days were not at all what I wanted, like they were all about other people and not for me. I don’t know why I feel like that. There was absolutely nothing in those days that would indicate that. Had I described what I wanted before the 3 days, I would have described our Christmas.

I know my birthday is sort of a nuisance. I mean, who wants more people, socialising or food on Boxing Day, who wants a birthday celebration? I am so used to it obviously and it doesn’t actually bother me, except today it does. I am irritated by happy birthday wishes on Facebook – assuming that people only sent them because FB reminded them to, same with LinkedIn. As if that is a bad thing (if you did write on my timeline – thank you. It was lovely to hear from you in the moment even if my brain is being weird today). I am actually just irritated by everything. The fact that it is Saturday has annoyed me all day, as has the fact that I put the ‘wrong’ socks on this morning. The wrong socks? I mean FFS, I just put on socks… at some point my brain decided they were wrong. It’s just an annoying, irritating and fucking stupid day.

I renewed my Body Coach app today. Obviously that was annoying because I had a discount code that I then couldn’t find and it should have been a 2 minute job that took forever. Given my total lack of fitness and the brain fuck that comparison therefore is, I decided to re-set the app completely and start all over again. As part of that I had to put my height and weight into the app… So, I am 47, the heaviest I have ever been, probably also the widest but I am saving the joy of measurements for tomorrow. I am also unfit as nicely highlighted by our Christmas morning run/walk and our Birthday trot out which was a mile of run/walk and then 2 miles of walk because my hips and feet were protesting. We went for a walk this afternoon. A lovely walk that was fucking annoying and which sent my right hip and right foot into proper bitch mode. Guess who hasn’t been stretching enough and who hasn’t done any strength work for months. Oh me, that’s me. Idiot.

And then, because today is a stupid day, I was scrolling, and I suddenly realised that for weeks now, if not longer, I have been bombarded by weight loss or fitness content on my social media. It’s relentless. Every second post I see is either ‘hormonal weight gain gone with this magic exercise/herbal tea’; ’50 habits you need to ditch of you’re heading for 50′; ‘ten things peri menopausal women are doing wrong in the gym’ or some nonsense about how you can get lean in 6 weeks in just 15 minutes a day… No wonder my brain is fried. Every bit of messaging seems to be ‘you need to be thinner’. Didn’t we do this already in the 90s? We do not need to go back there! I thought we had switched to ‘strong not skinny’ and a different way of thinking about exercise. I thought movement was good per se, not because movement might help weight loss. I see some content that acts as a counter balance but I have to go look for that. I nearly didn’t renew the Body Coach app because I saw several transformation pics as I was looking for my discount code – all of them emphasised the weight loss. All – Of – Them.

The fitness stuff on social media is awful. I have been scrolling past almost all of it because I don’t care what some teenage influencer thinks I should or shouldn’t be doing, or how fast, according to some hot shot, let me check, social media personality, I should be running a mile or whether I run a 5 k faster than a list of supposed celebrities. Or at least I thought I didn’t care. But just the fact that it is there constantly has obviously had an impact. I am less keen than ever to go back to the gym. I don’t belong there. I don’t want to get on the bike, don’t belong on Zwift either, that’s for people who can, you know, actually cycle rather than go backwards at the first sign of a hill. And as for running. Hm. I have no business being out there pretending to be a runner. I am not a runner. Maybe I was once but maybe those hopes and dreams about things I wanted to do should just stay dreams, maybe they are no longer achievable. That. Or maybe today is just a really stupid, annoying day. Maybe I just don’t like forced transitions and artificial cycles and the pressure to re-invent myself. Birthdays are one of those – ‘what’s it like to be 47?’ Such an idiotic question, I am a day older than yesterday… nothing is different. And then of course the new year is coming at us fast with all that comes with the New Year, New You crap. And for me birthday and new year are annoyingly close together giving me a delightful double whammy of ‘do better, be better, this is your time to make changes and improve, become a better version of yourself…’ Urgh. Is 2026 going to see the new me? Is this year, where I, aged 47, finally get my shit together? Is 2026 going to be my year? I fucking hope not. That sounds exhausting and people-y.

Anyway, I think the best thing that can be done with a day like today is to turn it into yesterday as quickly as possible. I am not even going to try and read because every book I have picked up today has been irritating. Tomorrow we stretch, take our magnesium and take it one step at a time and maybe some of those steps have purpose, maybe some of them are even running steps… because today is just a fucking stupid, irritating and annoying day but I am still me and the impossible is still out there, waiting to be done.