Tag: Dopey Challenge

The Fat Girls’ Guide to Running Runner of the Month

Jess Guth9 Comments

Hm, so I’m The Fat Girls’ Guide to Running‘s Runner of the Month. I am absolutely chuffed to bits that someone in the Clubhouse nominated me and that everyone seemed to agree that I should be it. Chuffed to bits but bemused… so let me explain. Oh and just a warning – I have got a hideous cold, I haven’t been out running, I should have been going to a party to celebrate one of the most loveliest and most supportive people I know and I’m not because of this cold and I’m feeling a little overwhelmed and emotional and have been thinking too much.

I mentioned that before Christmas I decided to sign up for the Countdown to Christmas challenge run by Julie Creffield – the woman behind the too fat to run brand who runs the Fat Girls’ Guide to Running community and its virtual running club called the Clubhouse. I thought a challenge that had me doing something health and fitness related every day in December would give me something positive to focus on while I was off work sick and trying to get my head screwed on right. Well I loved the Countdown to Christmas – and I was surprised that I did. I am not a hugely sociable person. I roll my eyes at online clubs and communities and I wasn’t expecting to really like the people. I was there for the challenges… Anyway, the people on that countdown were just lovely and many already belonged to the Clubhouse – so I signed up.

What I got from the Clubhouse was immediate and unconditional support. Support from women who know what it is like to put your running gear on and then sit on the sofa and cry because you caught a glimpse of yourself in the mirror; women who have the same fears, anxieties and questions. I instantly felt that I could share that we were not only attempting the marathon but the Dopey Challenge – not something I had wanted to share with anyone else. I had been a member for less than a month – just a couple of weeks in fact when we did Dopey and the Clubhouse community made it less scary. I posted updates and comments about how I was feeling before and after every race and I drew a huge amount of energy from the supportive messages that came back. Not something I would have thought was possible before I joined. The group even tracked me on marathon day posting updates to keep the group informed. It’s hard to explain what that means to me – you know the me that was always always picked last at sports because nobody really wanted the crap fat kid on the team – suddenly there is a whole group of people who are right behind you, believe you can do it and desperately want you to succeed.

So the Clubhouse is currently the best £10 per month I spend on my health and wellbeing but I am totally bemused by the Runner of the Month thing. The intro calls me incredible and speaks of determination and grit, amazing and awesome are other words used. Words I struggle to link to me or me running Dopey. Yes I ran Dopey, I really did, and I go look at the medal every now and again to check I didn’t dream it – but I just did what I did. I’m not special, I don’t warrant all this… when I think about this my brain just refuses to acknowledge that Dopey is a big deal. But it is. 48.6 miles in 4 days a year after not being able to run at all is a massive deal and I would be so so proud of anyone who did that. In fact I am so proud of Kath who took every single step with me, so proud of each and every one of my fellow 2016 Dopeys, so proud of the lovely Jacqui who ran the last third of the half marathon with us and yet I am somehow not really proud of myself. You see I’m just me and I’m not an awesome, amazing incredible woman with grit and determination, I’m just me. And maybe that’s the point that’s important here.

You see, if  little (ok large) average me can complete the Dopey Challenge then you can too – whoever you are and whatever you think you can and can’t do right now. So I’m trying to welcome the limelight and attention from being Runner of the Month but I’d like to think of it like this: What I did was awesome, what I did was amazing and incredible, what all of us Dopeys did over those 4 days three weeks ago was a fucking huge deal BUT and you better be paying attention to this – BUT I am no different to you. I have the same self-doubt, the same anxieties, the same ‘I can’t do this’ days and the same ‘fuck it I’ll have a glass of wine and another chocolate’ attitude. You see, if you see me as some sort of superwoman you are giving yourself permission to not try, to keep sitting on the sofa, to not change – if you recognise me for what I really am, just another overweight woman giving it a go, then we can go on this rollercoaster of a running journey together just putting one foot in front of the other as fast or slow as we want for as long as we want and that is fucking awesome.

Trying to go faster – sort of

Jess Guth2 Comments

I have been trying to get back in the game ever since we got back from Florida. The last run was hard but done but that was Tuesday, the rest of the week was a bit of a write off. I’ve been tired. Probably because I went back to work and put a lot of effort into not getting caught up in work stuff and just letting it go (oh look Frozen’s Let it go on a loop in my head). We were supposed to run Thursday, we didn’t. I meant to go to the gym at the hotel I was staying at Friday, I didn’t (ok so I freaked out over trendy London types spilling over into the lobby area from the bar and the idea of having to walk past them all in my gym stuff – totally pathetic but at the time a real issue) and then I meant to go again on Saturday, I didn’t (didn’t get up in time).

So Sunday came. With some trepidation I looked at the training plan we are now using although I knew what it said anyway: 4 X 1 mile. That means running a mile at about 30 seconds faster than race pace and doing that 4 times with 5 minutes walking in between. I don’t do fast. This is part of a Jeff Galloway plan so it’s all still about run/walk and really shouldn’t be a drama. To help me build mental strength and stamina to keep running for longer we agreed that we would run each of the miles without walking. Seemed like a good idea at the time…

Mile 1: We were both off like coiled springs in spite of having agreed to go out slow. We ran down the road stretching our legs nicely, turned right and started the hill, still felt fine. I took a deep breath as we levelled out for a few steps and then pushed hard up the last bit of the hill. Then there was downhill, a bit of flat and more downhill and then I suddenly started really feeling it. The last quarter of a mile (ish) was hard, really hard and I could feel my lungs like I haven’t for ages. On the slow long distance plods it’s my legs that give in eventually, here it felt like my lungs were about to explode. The walk break came. Time – 10.22

Mile 2: we started just as we come out of the wood and onto the golf course so this mile included the dreaded downhill section. I made it safely and then felt OK for about half a minute. Half a mile in my lungs reminded me they were there and working far too hard and a bit after that my hips started protesting. Kath asked if I wanted to take a walk but as much as every bit of me was screaming to walk I said no. I’d set out to run this bloody thing so that was what I was bloody well going to do. It was awful and then over. Time – 11.21

Mile 3: I felt good for a quarter of a mile. I was running in a nice rhythm and running seemed to make sense. My breathing was working with rather than against me and it felt easy… And then it didn’t. Then it got hard again, so hard I muttered something about just giving it all up and then swore. I was really trying to focus on positives and tap into that memory bank. I wanted to think about that amazing feeling of jogging gently through Epcot on 5 k day but my mind kept dragging me back  to the endlessness and pain of the ESPN Wild World of Sports complex on marathon day. But this mile did end. Time- 11.29

Mile 4: Last one. I was done with this running thing. My brain was not helping at all. It seemed to have come to the conclusion that because I ran Dopey, this should be easy. I was questioning why it was so hard. I mean I did Dopey FFS. But  I forget that Dopey was bloody hard, that the training up to Dopey was hard and that running is almost never easy. And then it was over and within seconds I was thrilled to have done the 4 miles even if I did hate almost every step of the way. Time- 11.31

So the pace is probably a little faster than I do when I go out normally but then I usually run/walk so it would be. After the first mile I wasn’t really thinking about pushing the pace I was just focussed on running the whole mile without walking. I counted in my head a lot today and that seemed to help.

Then we met my friend for her first run. We did the first run in a Jeff Galloway 5K programme which was 30 minutes of running for 15 seconds and walking for 45 seconds. She did really well, much better than I did when I went out for the first time! I remember not being able to do it so it was really nice to see her complete it with relative ease and it was nice to see how easy it was for me to do it while chatting. It was a little reminder that I have made real progress.

We just missed a bus home and it being Sunday there was a big gap between busses so we walked the 3 ish miles back home. Once there I reluctantly got on the scales for the first time since the 29th December. I weigh exactly the same as I did then. I’m happy with that and I feel like I am back in the game. I went fast- ish today for a bit and spent a good chunk of the day outside and moving. I feel a good sort of tired now, a physically tired rather than just mentally drained. Happy.

Life post Dopey

Jess GuthLeave a comment

I went for a run yesterday. It felt odd. A week and a half ago I completed a marathon after having done a half, a 10k and a 5k on the days before. Somehow going out to run felt a bit pointless. At the same time going out to run felt like the most exciting thing, ever. It felt good to be out. It was cold, I had been cold all day so I wore two long sleeved tops and my running jacket, gloves and my new RunDisney hat. I was too warm after about a minute.

We ran 45 minutes, mostly along the canal, no walking, just a slow plod. We didn’t have the Garmin so no idea about pace or distance but it was just nice to be out. It was funny how a 45 minute run felt like hard work, really hard work but yet it was so nice to only have to be out for 45 minutes. The last time I had running gear on I was out for nearly 7 hours.

Completing the marathon has given me something to draw on. Toward the end of the 45 minutes I was starting to struggle but the memory of just putting one foot in front of the other combined with the realisation that I was only going to have to keep going for 5 more minutes rather than 10 more miles made finishing the run easy.

As we started walking up the hill home I decided that it had been a good run and then I started feeling really sick and dizzy. I had some water and nuts when I got back and felt fine but I can do without that!

So it seems life post Dopey just goes on, nothing has really changed. 45 minute runs are still 45 minute runs, they are still hard, they are still awful and brilliant in equal measures and I don’t really feel any different about running. Or maybe I do because every now and again during the run I smiled to myself ‘I am 100% Dopey’.

More Dopey reflections

Jess Guth6 Comments

A week ago I ran, well walked mostly, a marathon. Hm. Doesn’t seem real at all. In fact, the idea that I completed the Dopey Challenge seems utterly bizzare. Me?! I can’t run! I can’t do that. But I did and here’s the proof:

Dopey cert JG

So if it feels like I am milking this a bit – I am  – but this is a huge deal. I went from not being able to run 100metres without hyperventilating and being in pain after to running 48.6 miles in 4 days in just about 12 months. I think I have earned the right to go on about it a bit. I’d also like to say thank you so much to all those of you who supported me through the running and who sponsored us. Our sponsorship page is still open if anyone would like to acknowledge our achievement and support Panthera. Thank you!

So, a week on and any muscle soreness (not that there was that much) has gone and my mega blister on my little toe has settled down; I am back home, it’s been snowing and tomorrow I go back to work. With a little bit of distance, here’s what I think and feel about the Dopey Challenge and what I learned.

  1. I ran a marathon! Well I walked a marathon mostly but I completed it within pacing requirements  – less than 16 minutes per mile – just.
  2. Conditions matter, they really matter. I knew it could well be hot and humid for the running but that still didn’t prepare me for how the humidity would impact on me. Heat on its own isn’t as bad but humidity even when it isn’t that warm is just something else. I couldn’t breathe
  3. The support from the crowds and from people supporting on facebook or by text messages etc make a huge difference and can be the difference between managing another little jog and giving up. Thank you to all those people who shouted encouragement along the routes
  4. I can walk pretty fast for a very long time
  5. I really would like to have run much more than I did in the marathon
  6. Half marathon is a good distance – it’s a real challenge and it comes with bragging rights but it’s not so bloody endless. I’d like to do a couple more half marathons
  7. Star Wars music is just the best for crossing a finish line.
  8. I don’t think I could do a marathon somewhere where there is nothing of interest to me to see. I had my major wobbles and nearly giving up points along long stretches of road where there was just nothingness. The theme parks saved me because they broke it up and gave me stuff to look at. So I could probably run something like Berlin, Hamburg or of course London because there are places there of historical or personal significance that I can focus on
  9. I have to remind myself that doing the Dopey is a big deal  – I struggle with that. I did it, therefore it can’t be that big a deal.
  10. However tired you are and however impossible it seems, it is always possible to run the finishing stretch and cross the line running. Always.
  11. Usually when I know I am not going to be good at something I just don’t do it or I find an excuse to give up early… not this time. It never crossed my mind to actually stop. Not once. I struggled badly from mile 5 of the 26.2. I thought I might not be able to complete the marathon and I was almost sure I wouldn’t make Dopey pace but I never thought I might actually stop. I thought I might be swept or possibly even taken off the course by medics if things got really bad but it never occured to me to actually stop.
  12. Every now and again I giggle to myself because I did it! I’m proper Dopey
  13. I haven’t run since Dopey but I did do a lot of walking in the theme parks and my next training plan starts with a 45 minute run on Tuesday – very possibly in the snow.
  14. I feel oddly calm about everything. Running the marathon after having run the 5k, 1ok and half marathon on the preceeding 3 days was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Physically that’s obvious but mentally too. It’s all fine – you just have to breathe through it.
  15. Running long distance takes you through all sorts of emotions – mostly for the marathon there was a mixture of self-doubt and determination with splashes of total desperation and despair and sprinkles of excitement and elation. I was sobbing from the minute I crossed the finish line and I had to hold my breath for the finisher photo to get myself under control. I wasn’t excited to cross the finish line, I was relieved! Being excited came later.
  16. I’m looking forward to running again

And there we have it – it was all a pretty amazing experience – from day 1 at the expo picking up our race packs with all the shirts and the bib numbers etc to day 5 – the marathon. The early starts somehow add to the occassion and the events are so massive that it is hard not to get caught up on the occassion. I won’t promise that this will be my last Dopey post – in fact it won’t be because there are photos to sort through yet and I wanted to tell you about the race retreat and the runners world challenge package etc but for now I’ll leave you with this – hower unlikely that seems to me :

badge_dopey

Quick reflections on Dopey

Jess Guth5 Comments

i have been meaning to post some reflections on the Dopey Challenge but I’ve been too busy going on rides (the ones for kids mostly, nothing fast, scary or motion sickness inducing), eating cake and drinking wine, mojitos and beer

It is our last full day in Florida today and a week since we started the Dopey Challenge with that amazing 5k run. So what are my reflections so far.

  1. I still don’t feel like I am a runner, you know, one of them. I’m just not.
  2. eventhough I know I did all 4 races legitimately and within pacing requirements I feel a little niggle every time someone says congratulations (and that happens a lot here), like somehow I don’t deserve it because I’m not really a runner.
  3. Being told ‘well done’ and ‘awesome’ and ‘congratulations’ over and over is pretty fun and good for the soul but… See above.
  4. I was amazed that I could move after Dopey. Yes my legs were a little tired and achey but not really sore. My hamstring on the right was tight but nothing more and when I walked for a while my hips tightened but that only lasted 2 days.
  5. Blisters are bitches. I so rarely get nasty ones but the one on my left little toe is the most painful thing ever!
  6. running is 99% in the mind – I just completed Dopey but right now am fairly convinced I wouldn’t make it a mile if I went for a run.
  7. I am mentally incredibly weak and incredibly strong at the same time. Weak because I didn’t manage to power through the poor start to the marathon and a poor start in poor conditions determined my race. The first few minutes set the tone and I couldn’t recover from that. Strong for actually finishing at all.
  8. I think I might be done with Dopey
  9. The impossible is possible
  10. I am quite proud of myself (but see 1 and 2)