So it’s the day after the 20 mile day. Time to reflect on yesterday’s run. Well, good news I guess – nothing hurts. The toes on my right foot are a little tender and my hips are tight. I’ll do more stretches later.

I forget from long run to long run how hungry I get after. As I said we had a perfect recovery meal very quickly after the run and then we went out for tea –  early, before 5pm and I had another big meal (and chocolate cake – come on I just ran 20 miles!). I woke up hungry and I’ve been hungry ever since really. I had a bacon sarnie in the supermarket cafe before doing our food shop, our usual Saturday morning breakfast and I’ve nibbled my way through the morning and am now ready for lunch… I need to strategically place bananas, grapes and other healthy snacks so I don’t end up eating biscuits all afternoon.

I’m also tired. I didn’t sleep well again – probably because of the wind – it sounded wild out there. I was awake from just before 2am until who knows when and then from 7am ish. I was struggling to get comfy because my hips felt tight so I was tossing and turning a lot resulting in teh catten being attached to my feet a lot. And once awake of course my stupid brain kicks in.

So I have been over that 20 mile run/walk in detail, lots of detail. I shall spare you it all because it’s all depression induced crap. It’s all the usual ‘OMG how pathetic was I at that point’ and ‘I really should have done better there’ and ‘well if I can’t even cope there then let’s just forget the marathon…’. I think I might be getting a little stronger though, just a little, but still. My inner voice is still screaming at me to pull out and not embarrass myself; it’s still telling me I can’t do this but I’m a little more confident in the fact that it is probably a liar.