More 8 minutes, more mantras and a revelation

On Monday I told you about my 8 minutes times 3 running. Well it was the same again for the next run – which was today. I didn’t go this morning so actually chances of it happening at all diminished as the day went on. We had to get something looked at on the car and did the food shop and then were hungry and then too full and then we fell asleep… anyway, then we went for a run. I think Kath had a 5 miler and I watched her set off in the rain as I tried to find something to occupy Odin kitten so he wouldn’t follow me.

I went a different route this time. The first 8 minutes were comfortable and I enjoyed the rain on my face and the lack of people. I was staying on the roads round the village and it was lovely and quiet. I don’t remember thinking about much at all. It was just nice to be out and moving. As I finished my first walk break and settled into the 2nd run I remembered something that Kath had said about mantras – apparently using ‘you’ rather than ‘I’ works better. So I tried that; ‘You are strong and you can do this’ – nope my brain did not like that one. The little voice in my head did this:

I tried just ‘You can do this’ and a more confident ‘You are doing this’ and some variations on that theme but now I am referring to myself as another person and quite frankly I am quite loony enough without adding that. So with that little voice in my head still falling over itself laughing, I nearly got run over by some muppet in a corsa who didn’t know what the flashy little orange lights on his car do and somehow thought that’s my fault and had run for 7 minutes. One minute to go. Up hill. But it’s just a minute. And now I know that I can run for 8 minutes, a minute seems doable. And it is.

The 2nd walk break finished just as the slope upwards intensifies. I have to start running. I have moments of doubt. I daren’t go back to the mantras because, well, the voice in my head has had quite enough hilarity for one day. So I keep my eyes fixed on a parked car. Slowly, slowly I get closer. And then it drives off. I mean, really. The universe couldn’t have just let me get to the car and pick my next mark? My brain was saying I had to get to the car… the car that was now out of sight. Yeah, thanks. I was unreasonably outraged by the car just driving off. ‘That was my marker’ I screamed silently in my head. I’d been running for about 90 seconds. Outrage can take you another minute or so further. Then I had to cross the road and honestly, I was grateful I had to stop and let some cars do their thing. Once it was clear, I headed off again towards the canal towpath.

My legs had sort of had enough really and my breathing was more steam train than human. So when a woman and her child on a bike didn’t move as I approached and said excuse me twice, I just raised an eyebrow at her ‘Sorry love I didn’t hear you’ as I sidestepped onto the grass. If she didn’t hear me coming she needs to get herself to the doctor to get them ears of hers checked. Anyway, as I was still pondering the weirdness of people I glanced at my watch and realised I had run 5 of the 8 minutes. 3 to go. I wanted to stop really but the woman and child on the bike were behind me and I do have some pride. So I told myself that I just needed to get to where the line of houses starts and then I could walk. That seemed ok-ish. I got there and only had 20 seconds left to run so just kept going until the watch beeped. Done. 2 minutes walk later and my 30 minutes were done.

I have been grumpy about how slow I have been but this lot of 8 minute runs with 2 minute walks was at 13 and a half minutes per mile pace which is much better than the just a smidge over 15 minute miles from Monday. I know it’s not about pace or about going further or faster each run. I know that, but it did cheer me up to see a pace number of under 14. I think it means that this programme is working and that slowly and surely my body is remembering how to run and do it more efficiently and comfortably. It’s a glimmer of hope that maybe soon I might even enjoy a run as I do it rather than only afterwards.

Kath caught me up just a minute or two after I had finished and was walking home. We walked together a few minutes and then she set off the run the last bit. When I got home this was stuck on the door and it made me giggle – although I had no energy for a happy dance just then.

I was already sweaty and in running gear so I thought I would do my Nike App exercises after the run. I had done this particular workout before (though do not get me started on plank saws etc again) and it wasn’t too horrendous. So I grabbed my phone and set the workout to start. However my t-shirt was soaking wet from the rain and really quite uncomfortable. Sod it, I thought, I’ll just take it off. And there I was, doing a workout just in my running tights and sports bra. So that was a bit of a revelation. I have always been a bit skeptical seeing women out running or at the gym or in exercise classes wearing tops that are essentially just a sports bra. Skeptical not because of the way they look but because somehow I couldn’t get my head round being comfortable. Yes I realise this is silly and says way more about me. But anyway, hello superwoman. Exercising in just a sport bra for a top was different. It felt somehow empowering. I don’t think I’ll ever run outside or go to the gym just in a sports bra top because quite honestly I can’t do with the staring or the comments, I have other things to worry about but here, at home in my spare bedroom, hell yes.

Week 3 of marathon training

Well week three of marathon training didn’t go to plan. Nothing happened to de-rail the plan, I just didn’t go out to run. I started off ok with a loop out on Tuesday for my 30 minute run. Painfully slow and not exactly fun but done on the right day and ticked off. On Thursday for run two my anxiety levels were through the roof and I decided not to go because it was the sort of anxiety that would just make a run miserable and counter-productive. There was always Friday.

Odin – just over 8 weeks old

Well Friday there was but I was dead on my feet. I felt absolutely knackered and could barely keep my eyes open. Ok, I thought, well I can go out Saturday and Sunday and still get the runs in. The gap and then back to back is a bit inconsistent and annoying but it’s ok. Well Saturday was such as non day. I struggled. It was one of those quite physical depression days. I barely moved off the sofa and everything I did just didn’t seem to turn our right. The lunch I made wasn’t very nice, the bread I made slightly overdone and then while playing with Odin he scratched me on across my eye. What I should have done on any of these days is get up and just get the running bit done. The longer I am awake, the less likely it is I will get out – but of course depression also means that getting out of bed early is just impossible. So let’s try and remember that going out for a run as soon as I am awake enough to do so is a good plan and see if that helps a little for week 4!

I managed to go out this morning. I managed to haul my arse round 4 miles. It was painfully slow and looking at the stats afterwards just makes me miserable and grumpy (so let’s not look). But it’s done. I’m down one run this week and I will try and catch it up in week 4. It’ll make me feel better. So for this coming week I would like to run my 30minute ish runs on Monday, Wednesday and Thursday and then my long run of 5.5 miles on Saturday or Sunday. That should be do-able. I’d quite like the rain to stay actually because there was hardly anyone out and about today and I’d sort of forgotten that I actually quite like running in the rain.

As for cross-training, I am really conscious that I have hardly done anything and that I should. However, I am also conscious that having a plan of stuff to do seems to stress me out. I need to find a better way of doing some strength work and stretching without it feeling like it is too much or freaking me out. So maybe for this coming week I’ll just say I’d like to do something, let’s say twice. Yes something twice sounds ok. I’ll go with that.

I’ve been doing the Sunday (now Monday) weigh-ins and the scales are not moving at all. I guess that means they’re not going up and of course I am not really surprised they’re not going down. I have not changed anything for any weight to actually come off. I do think making our own treats – like these yummy Mickey Ears scones Kath made – helps. There is something nice and more mindful about eating stuff we’ve made (and there is generally less crap in home made stuff). Cooking from scratch also helps, being bored, not moving much and not drinking enough water doesn’t help. It’ll come eventually, as I get back into running (well, presuming this iteration of my running journey mirrors the last) my relationship with food will also change again. I will crave fresh fruit and crunchy veg (broccoli mostly) where I now crave the comfort of mashed potato made with loads of butter and I will inevitably start drinking much more water. I’ll keep you posted.

Dopey Simulation 1 – Miles in the Rain

Today I had a lovely little run/walk at Bolton Abbey and by ‘little’ I mean 10 miles. Nothing happened, nothing at all. No drama, no struggle, no serious tiredness, no pain… So that wasn’t necessarily expected. Long runs often mean some kind of drama and this one came after a 45 minute run on Thursday and a 4 mile run yesterday. So let me tell you about just how uneventful this run was.

We got to Bolton Abbey at 9am, had a pee, set off separately – I wanted to run 1 minute, walk 1 minute to make sure it was nice and easy and I have enough left for tomorrow. Kath did her own thing and I watched her disappear up the slope, got distracted by something and then couldn’t see her anymore. I didn’t know if she’d gone the top or bottom way. I just kept plodding along in the rain, passed a red spaniel with its humans and it said hi and bye. I got to mile 1 and then mile 2 and saw Kath at the other side of the river and jumped up and down and waved but she didn’t see me. I crossed over Barden Bridge and saw two blokes with a black dog which was excited to come through the gate into the field with me.

Half Way Point

Mile 3 came and went and then mile 4 and I was happily running a minute and walking a minute. I briefly stopped at mile 5 to take a half way picture and plodded on. A little after that I met another red spaniel, a baby spaniel (with her humans) who had trouble keeping her excitement under control. I plodded on, mile 6, past the Abbey and up through the grounds and then back down the other side down through the field and into the car park, along the car park and towards the Cavendish Pavilion. There was a split second where I wondered whether maybe the 7ish miles I’d done was enough and the temptation of a steaming cup of coffee was real but I quickly turned right across the bridge to tackle the aqueduct loop the ‘wrong way round’. 

Kath coming down the hill

7 miles. I was just about to walk up the steep long section that usually terrifies me running down it the other way, when I saw Kath coming down it. We had a quick chat and on I went. I wasn’t strictly sticking to the 1 minute/1 minute anymore now. I walked a little more of the uphill and ran more of the downhill rather than taking the intervals where they fell. 8 miles. Then pretty much 8.5 miles as I reached the aqueduct and crossed over – and on I went. I was getting a little tired now but it was all still very comfortable.

I met a couple more dogs and their humans, 9 miles. I stopped for a picture with Rudolph and plodded on. I tried to text Kath to ask her to order me a bacon sarnie so I wouldn’t miss the breakfast serving time but I had no signal. I counted down the Advent Calendar Christmas trees as I passed them and weaved my way round small people and their obnoxious parents who seemed to fill the entire path with prams, bags and swinging limbs. I could see Santa’s grotto. 10 miles. I sped up. I had just a few minutes before breakfast would end. I made eye contact with an elf outside the grotto who tried to stop a family from stepping out of the grotto and into my path but failed and I nearly mowed down ‘grandma’ who seemed to take my ‘excuse me’ as her cue to step further into my path and fling her arms out. We did a slightly awkward little dance and I was through. Just a few more steps and I was done. Tailwind rebuild recovery and a bacon sarnie together with a huge cup of coffee seemed like a suitable way to celebrate a good run

Me and Rudolph

So how are we doing with the Dopey simulation? Well it has all been about the rain – the run today was mostly in the rain. The run last night was all in the rain – it was a plod but  I got out after a day of 6 hours of teaching and the best part of 10 hours at work. Thursday I actually managed to get out when it wasn’t raining. Kath and I happily plodded our sheep loop and just as we got back it poured it down. So there we are, it’s going well. The big one is tomorrow. 20 miles. I’m mildly terrified but also looking forward to it. See you on the other side.

Splish Splash I was having a….

Run. I was having a run. No that sounds wrong. I was running. Well sort of. I was out there putting one foot in front of the other at varying paces. It looked like it was going to be another of those days where it just doesn’t happen. I have a ton of marking to do – the kind that takes forever because it’s formative so needs even more detailed feedback, we went out for lunch and that took longer than we wanted it to and the weather – urgh.

Anyway, I had ordered some new trainers ridiculously reduced – some Inov8 Roclite 305 gore-tex ones for under 50 quid. I mean it would have been rude not to. So I set myself a target of 5 more essays and then I could/had to go run. I put long pants on – yep time for big girl pants, too cold for 3/4 now I reckon – a long-sleeved top, my rain jacket and then because light was fading fast, a bright neon yellow t-shirt over the top. I looked a right plonker but I wasn’t about to be cold! Then I put the new shoes on and set off.

I can’t really do a proper review because it was only a short plod and I walked the uneven, muddy, trail-y bit because I couldn’t really see where I was putting my feet and my ankles were quite stiff and I am terrified of injuring myself. But  – why the hell did nobody tell me about gore-tex trainers before? I had so much fun not avoiding puddles and splish sploshing around that I started searching  puddles out to jump into them – and I still have dry socks. I can do puddles and have dry feet. It’s magic! I never had gore-tex trainers before. Getting some somehow always felt like a step too far – they’re for proper runners. I don’t really go anywhere where I need them, or for long enough that wet feet really matter… so the complete crap would go in my head.  I tried some once and they felt really tight and inflexible compared to the non gore-tex version so I presumed they were all like that. I was wrong. Love these. Bring on the puddles!

Happy running and splish splash splashing about!

Wimping out (sensibly?)

I have spent much of the night listening to the wind and rain. At just before 6am we gave up on sleep and instead studied the weather forecast and radar pictures. There is a weather warning in force for this area for wind and rain and the forecast radar looked wet indeed. So we decided that being out in this weather for several hours wasn’t a good plan. It did say that the rain would clear by midday and give way to showers but that would still mean running for 2.5 ish hours in heavy rain and then still have another 2.5 ish hours to go – possibly in showers and definitly in a biting, strong wind. Going later doesn’t work either because we’d run out of daylight. No 23 miles for us today.

At this point I really need to get to the start line without injury and without any major setbacks. Getting a cold because of being soaked and cold for 5 hours would be a major setback and sustaining an injury because of slipping on the mud would be a disaster. So the plan is to do a 23 mile run on whatever day looks more favourable next weekend. Thinking about it we should probably have prioritised the run over the walk this weekend – we would have been wet but it was probably doable yesterday…

The thing is, I am oddly calm about the distance. I walked 10 miles yesterday and I feel no different today than if I hadn’t walked at all. No tightness or soreness, not even in my right calf muscle. 26.2 miles will be fine – it will be slow and it will be tough and I’m sure there will be times along the way where I just want to stop but it will be fine. How slow exactly it will be might well depend on the weather over the next few weeks and how much confidence I can get from a couple more long runs – or not

I was perfectly happy with the decision we made but now it has cleared a little and I am second guessing. Maybe we should have got organised to go… although just as a type that it’s started persisting it down again..

I feel like I’m wimping out but I also feel like that might be a sensible sort of wimping out.

Happy Sunday